We didn't have a clue. We didn't know that we didn't have a clue, but we didn't have a clue!

I was 20. So, of course, I knew everything. My wife, or soon to be wife, was 21 and knew only very slightly less than I since she was slightly older. She still is, but percentage-wise, I'm much closer now.

We were married by a Chinese Justice of the Peace, Dr Teyhi Hsieh (pronounced Tay-he She). He was an ex- Buddhist, married to an ex- Methodist. Interestingly, she converted him and he converted her. He was "the" person to get married by at the time. It was 1966, in Boston - Club 47, hootenannies in the basement, folk singers all over. Everyone who was anyone in that scene and getting married went to him. He was also the Honorary Chaplain of Curry College in Milton MA, the managing director of the Chinese Trade and Labor Bureau and "The Roosevelt of China". (His wife was Madame Chiang Kai-shek's personal secretary for a number of years.)

My mother gave us about two weeks notice that we were to get married. We, who collectively knew almost everything, hadn't given it much thought. But there was a child on the way and it was not in our parents stars to have this birth occur without a marriage first.

Charlotte had not a dress to wear to her wedding, but we had a friend, Ed, who purported to be a designer and who agreed to make her one. He did, and she actually wore it, although her grandmother insisted that she wear a string of pearls to help cover the expanse of bare skin showing above the plunging neckline.

As we entered the Chung-Mei Chia (It has occurred to me only as I write this that there was no Chia pet in residence - at least not that I saw.) Chapel in Brighton, MA, which was also the home of Dr and Mrs Hsieh, he greeted us with plastic leis to put around our necks. There were two 30 gallon trash barrels full of wrapped gifts and we chose one from each barrel. Dr Hsish didn't want anyone to get married without wedding gifts. We got steak knives, and two small, black and white tiled ash trays which we still have.

There were 7 of us in the wedding party. My parents, Charlotte's mother, my 2 brothers and sister-in-law, and Charlotte's grandmother. It was a very interesting ceremony, half Christian, of sorts, and half Buddhist, of sorts. During the ceremony, Dr Hsieh included a number of Chinese figurines representing love, friendship, etc that were on the mantle over the fireplace. He also included his much beloved saying (that is also printed at the bottom of his hand cartographed marriage license):

"Love each other for what you are;

Forgive each other for what you "AIN'T"."

I noticed during the ceremony that Charlotte's Roman Catholic Grandmother kept looking wishfully out the living room window. As it happened, we were directly across the street from the residence of Cardinal Cushing, which was quite visible through the window. In fact, at one point during what must have been for her a somewhat strenuous experience, she turned to Charlotte's mother and asked "When this is all over, will they really be married?"

Well, Something must have been right. We've been married through 2 children and 43 years and we haven't killed each other yet!